NOT about any LJ drama
May. 10th, 2005 02:30 pmI'm feeling pretty chipper because of the lovely sun, and yet kind of cranky because of some of the crap going on in the on-line venues I frequent (not really so much LJ at this particular moment).
I have to keep telling myself that the things that bug me about other people are often the things I don't like in myself.
I'm finding myself irritated by one specific venue, and by a group of women who frequent that venue, and one in particular, who is an abrasive, raging bitch. But everyone tiptoes around them almost all the time because they're hot and they occasionally post nude or semi-nude photos of themselves. It bothers me that their Queen Bitch attitudes are being reinforced. If nobody slaps these bitches up, they're never going to learn that it's not OK to be gratuitously mean to people.
The Empress of the Queen Bitches loves to pick apart things anyone says and has to be really snarky in the process. Don't get me wrong: I love slaying sacred cows and playing Devil's Advocate. But she does it most to people she dislikes for unrelated reasons, and lets things pass from people who worship her appropriately. She also takes a snotty tone instead of just saying, "I don't understand where you're coming from," or "That hasn't been my experience."
On the other extreme are the placaters who say, "Well, it's subjective," or "It's different for everyone." Well, duh! How many topics outside of math and hard science is that untrue of? I think that unless someone is obnoxiously and explicitly making universalizing statements about everyone, when you state your opinion on the topic thread at hand, it should be completly fucking obvious that it's your subjective viewpoint and you're not talking for everyone. But if every subject devolves into everyone agreeing that "It's different for everyone," then what's the use of having that conversation?
Argh.
I have to keep telling myself that the things that bug me about other people are often the things I don't like in myself.
I'm finding myself irritated by one specific venue, and by a group of women who frequent that venue, and one in particular, who is an abrasive, raging bitch. But everyone tiptoes around them almost all the time because they're hot and they occasionally post nude or semi-nude photos of themselves. It bothers me that their Queen Bitch attitudes are being reinforced. If nobody slaps these bitches up, they're never going to learn that it's not OK to be gratuitously mean to people.
The Empress of the Queen Bitches loves to pick apart things anyone says and has to be really snarky in the process. Don't get me wrong: I love slaying sacred cows and playing Devil's Advocate. But she does it most to people she dislikes for unrelated reasons, and lets things pass from people who worship her appropriately. She also takes a snotty tone instead of just saying, "I don't understand where you're coming from," or "That hasn't been my experience."
On the other extreme are the placaters who say, "Well, it's subjective," or "It's different for everyone." Well, duh! How many topics outside of math and hard science is that untrue of? I think that unless someone is obnoxiously and explicitly making universalizing statements about everyone, when you state your opinion on the topic thread at hand, it should be completly fucking obvious that it's your subjective viewpoint and you're not talking for everyone. But if every subject devolves into everyone agreeing that "It's different for everyone," then what's the use of having that conversation?
Argh.