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Feb. 12th, 2004
Childless by choice
Feb. 12th, 2004 03:13 pmI think it's hilarious that when I click on the "friends" link for one of my lj friends, I get lots of anti-child rants from a Child-free community, and when I click on another lj friend's "friends" link, I get stuff about parenting, changing diapers, and all that stuff the childfree folks are always saying they're tired of hearing about. It gives me a chuckle.
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dionysus1999 and I are childless by choice, but neither of us is particularly anti-child. I understand not wanting your own children, obviously, because I don't want any of my own. But the vitriolic hatred of children that *some* childless/childfree folks spew always seems a bit over-the-top. Everyone was a child at some point, so if you really *hate* kids, doesn't that indicate that maybe you have some deep-seated issues about your own childhood?
I tend to really like most kids. Some get on my nerves, but I generally think it's their parents' fault. I met my cousin's 5-year-old for the first time at Christmas, and I thought he was a badly-behaved little snot. He got a silver chain for Christmas (to be like redneck Dad), and cried and stomped and tried to rip it in half because it wasn't long enough. "Take it back! I don't want it!" he whined. Little shit.
On the other hand, I have friends with kids and I LOVE their kids. I also love my nieces and nephews on my side. J's brother's wife just had a baby, and I enjoyed holding him, and J's sister is going to have a baby later this year, and I'm looking forward to cuddling that one.
I really enjoyed babysitting when I was younger, too. One summer when I was 15 or 16, I cared for a 2 year old for about 6 hours a day 4 days a week. We used to put "Yo, MTV Raps" on the TV and I'd hold him and dance around with him, or I'd fill up his kiddy pool and let him splash around in it. He was a great kid, and I loved that job.
So, the reason I don't want kids of my own has nothing to do with disliking children. I just think they're a big committment. If I do something, I want to do it right. Being a parent is a sacred responsibility, and I don't take it lightly. I enjoy my free time, being able to travel at whim, focusing on my career, and all kinds of other things that are higher priorities for me than reproducing and raising a child for 18 years. I think you CAN work outside the home and be a good parent, but it's tough, and I'm not willing to make the required sacrifices to be a GOOD parent.
dionysus1999 and I are childless by choice, but neither of us is particularly anti-child. I understand not wanting your own children, obviously, because I don't want any of my own. But the vitriolic hatred of children that *some* childless/childfree folks spew always seems a bit over-the-top. Everyone was a child at some point, so if you really *hate* kids, doesn't that indicate that maybe you have some deep-seated issues about your own childhood?I tend to really like most kids. Some get on my nerves, but I generally think it's their parents' fault. I met my cousin's 5-year-old for the first time at Christmas, and I thought he was a badly-behaved little snot. He got a silver chain for Christmas (to be like redneck Dad), and cried and stomped and tried to rip it in half because it wasn't long enough. "Take it back! I don't want it!" he whined. Little shit.
On the other hand, I have friends with kids and I LOVE their kids. I also love my nieces and nephews on my side. J's brother's wife just had a baby, and I enjoyed holding him, and J's sister is going to have a baby later this year, and I'm looking forward to cuddling that one.
I really enjoyed babysitting when I was younger, too. One summer when I was 15 or 16, I cared for a 2 year old for about 6 hours a day 4 days a week. We used to put "Yo, MTV Raps" on the TV and I'd hold him and dance around with him, or I'd fill up his kiddy pool and let him splash around in it. He was a great kid, and I loved that job.
So, the reason I don't want kids of my own has nothing to do with disliking children. I just think they're a big committment. If I do something, I want to do it right. Being a parent is a sacred responsibility, and I don't take it lightly. I enjoy my free time, being able to travel at whim, focusing on my career, and all kinds of other things that are higher priorities for me than reproducing and raising a child for 18 years. I think you CAN work outside the home and be a good parent, but it's tough, and I'm not willing to make the required sacrifices to be a GOOD parent.
